Interview by muzzle and Buffy
OverByte: Where did you guys start out playing? Bars? Coffee houses?
Chris Collingwood: We met at the Mississippi River Delta, hopped a river boat and we learned the trade along the way. They used to call [Brian] 'Lightning Bug'.
OB: Are you all the original members?
C.C.: We kicked out this guy, Jeff, because Jeff decided to be an 'art guy' instead of a 'rock guy'.
OB: Ohhhh. Bitter?
C.C.: There's this guy named Sound Gordon. We kicked him out because he kept wanting to, um, run around without his shirt on. And then, there was this other guy named Earl Jam and he was an asshole.
Jody Porter: [to Chris] What about Bert?
C.C.: Ohhh. Bert Cobain. We didn't kick him out-
J.P.: He checked out...
OB: So what would you say was the most difficult part about coming together as a band?
C.C.: [to muzzle] Are you from Canada? You said 'a-boat'.
muzzle: Um...sorry. So tell us some obstacles you've had to conquer as a band. You know. People not taking you seriously because you're cocks... Uhhh...Just kidding.
C.C.: Yeah, that is an issue. About two weeks ago, there was some woman backstage and she asked us what one of our songs was about and I made up some lie and then her-
OB: It sounds like you make up a lot of lies.
C.C.: -boyfriend...What do you mean?
OB: Are you pathalogical liars?
C.C.: [pointing to muzzle's rhinestone-studed dog collar necklace] Are you a dog?
muzzle: No. Are you making fun of me?
C.C.: Just your collar.
muzzle: Isn't it pretty, though?
C.C.: I like it a lot.
muzzle: You'd better like it, 'cause it's nice.
C.C.: It's very cool. Can I call you 'Fido'?
muzzle: No.
C.C.: Whoa! I just realized how it must sound...calling a woman a dog. I'm sorry.
muzzle: Well, yeah! It's okay.
C.C.: Actually, you're a very attractive woman.
muzzle: Thanks.
muzzle: So how much have you all been drinking this evening?
C.C.: Not enough.
OB: Not enough because you're not passed out yet? Brian Young: Not enough because we're still awake. We're still forming complete sentences.
OB: So...influences.
C.C.: The Beatles, Larry Hagman.
OB: [jokingly] Oasis, huh?
C.C.: No, no, no. That's not an influence. We like D-Generation. I like '80s.
OB: Any bands that you're really good friends with?
C.C.: We get along with all the Scratchie posse, like fulflej, and Chainsaw Kittens. One band we don't get along with is Sound Gordon. We don't get along with Sound Gordon at all.
OB: Really? Why?
C.C.: It's a long story.
OB: That's okay. We've got time.
C.C.: Well, we were in rehab with them and we were trying to get clean, and they just wouldn't let us. We don't get along with Earl Jam, either. Sound Gordon used to beat us up in high school. He's a bully. The only problem I really had with [Sound Gordon] is that he had facial hair before me, but I guess that's just a jealousy thing. He advises a lot of people to go 'Blow Up the Outside World', but we're just too tired for that.
OB: So are you trying to send a message through your music or are you just in it for the money like everyone else?
C.C.: What money?
J.P.: I think it's 'Stay in school, don't sniff glue' because you can get your nose all stuck together. And the kids these days! They experiment with glue, and from there they go on to cement, and it's just a mess.
Brian Young: I don't knwo what's up with kids these days. It's all 'Boom boom', there's no melody. I don't understand it! It's all 'Boom, boom'.
OB: Okay, if you weren't in Fountains of Wayne, what would you be doing?
C.C.: I'd be a goat herder.
OB: Oh really. And where would you go to be a goat herder?
C.C.: Islam.
OB: [pointing to Brian] And how 'bout you?
B.Y.: Uhhh. A monster. Here's what I think. There's this guy. He's fifty years old, right? And he's in this rock band called Kiss. He's like, got a twelve-year-old over here [hand motions to his left side, then to his right] and a fifteen-year-old over here.
OB: So you want twelve- and fifteen-year-olds hanging all over you?
B.Y.: Not 'til I'm fifty.
OB: How do you guys feel about yourselves as a band quickly becoming mainstream?
C.C.: We don't give a shit about being underground. We do it for the kids. We rock for the kids.
OB: Gee, that sounds familiar [Joe Reineke, Meices, OverByte Issue 1, Volume 1]. What kind of age group are you looking to get at?
C.C.: Elderly women.
OB: Do you guys have a video that we haven't seen yet? [Since the interview, MTV has had it on pretty heavy rotation]
C.C.: Yeah.
Buffy: Let me guess-on 120 Minutes, right?
C.C.: Yeah, they don't have that in Milwaukee.
OB: No, they play it on MTV which goes into Milwaukee. [sarcastically] They don't show that in Milwaukee... Yeah, you're right. We don't get MTV in Milwaukee.
C.C.: But they do have the Anheuser-Busch Channel. Wait...that's Missouri. What's in Milwaukee?
muzzle: [jokingly] Miller.
C.C.: [to muzzle] I really like your accent.
muzzle: My Wisconsin accent?
C.C.: It pleases me.
muzzle: Well, um, thanks.
J.P.: Did you know that Larry Hagman has a new liver? It's like, if you can afford it, you can keep on drinking. Are you frauds? Just kidding.
OB: Do you get insulted when all anyone ever asks about is 'Radiation Vibe'?
C.C.: No, not really. You know what I don't like is when people sit there and read off the press release. I like it when people ask intelligent questions. Even when people ask crap questions, if they have a cool accent, it works. [We weren't reading off the press release, but we didn't think we were asking 'crap questions', either]
OB: Alright. Do you call it 'soda' or 'pop'?
C.C.: Soda, of course!
OB: Good. Boxers or briefs?
C.C.: Boxers. [to muzzle] Can I ask you a personal question?
muzzle: Yes, you may.
C.C.: Are you gonna enjoy our rock recital?
muzzle: Of course.
C.C.: Now I feel like I know you. What if one of us starts to vomit on stage. Will you still dig it?
muzzle: As long as I don't have to step in it or smell it._________________________________________________________________
Less than ten minutes later, Fountains of Wayne stormed the stage and put on a completely rockin' show. It's too bad that the audience only got into 'Radiation Vibe'-there were a lot of good songs that haven't been released for radio airplay yet that have the potential to put 'Radiation Vibe' to shame. Keep your eyes and ears on alert-Fountains of Wayne will be the opening band for the last leg of the Smashing Pumpkins' Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness Tour.
____________________________________________________________